The Fat Grackle

Fat Caused All My Problems

I suppose this deserves a warning because it talks about fat hate and self-injury

When I was recovering from a time of my life that included severe depressive episodes and self-injury (2001), my mom took me to talk to our new preacher. I was way better but still struggling with the urges to cut.

What did he tell me during this meeting? “You need to lose weight, I know you can’t be happy being the size you are. You’ll feel way better about yourself. I know someone who can help you go on a diet” (insinuating that all my problems stemmed from the size of my body)…. We are going to forget the rape and all the other things that happened that could be contributing to my current state… I’m sad because I’m fat. I hadn’t even considered my weight at this point but he certainly planted the thought.

Sometimes I wish I could go back and stand up for myself instead of accepting it because I felt like I deserved it.

I’m getting fat hate on pinterest now…. What’s that about?

The Art and Science of Rational Eating


“Fat people, it is commonly held, should be punished because they offend our aesthetic sensibilities. They take up too much space on subways, buses, airplanes, and elevators. They consume more than they contribute to society. They become ill and need to be taken care of, or they die early and their families are left unsupported. The only way fat people can gain some acceptance and forgiveness for their crime of overeating is to at least try, or look like they are trying, to lose weight. They must never eat an ice cream cone in public, never be seen eating a normal sized portion of non-diet food!”

Albert Ellis, Michael Abrams, Lidia Dengelegi, The Art & Science of Rational Eating (via euphoricelixir)

It is laughable that this quote is actually being used the way I found it being used. The book being quoted actually argues things like:

We will show that the actual evidence robustly points in another direction. It shows that there are many different types of people, all shapes, sizes, and styles, and obesity, rather than being symptom of neurosis, may say no more about a person than her height, hair color, or skin texture.

In this book we shall argue against these notions by showing that obesity stems more from genetic and biological than from neurotic roots, and that most personality traits “causing” obesity actually originate from people lambasting themselves for being fat.

I was particularly fond of the following quote (even though I do not advocate dieting), because of its emphasis on the individual’s need for self love:

Changing one’s weight or eating style has been shown to be a most difficult long-term behavioral goal. The obese individual has a far lesser chance of permanently becoming thin than the heroin addict has of becoming clean, the crack user becoming drug free, or the alcoholic staying dry. With such an imposing obstacle to clear, the dieter had better learn to accept himself as he is, prior to making a grand effort to become thin. A person prone to self-downing actually discourages himself from changing traits that he loathes. If one hates oneself, one tends to be particularly unmotivated to work at self-improvement. “If I am no good, how can ‘rotten me’ improve my rotten traits?” Rational-emotive therapy encourages self-acceptance, not merely self-efficacy, and not self-esteem. As noted above, both of those forms of self-rating work badly. To achieve self-esteem you have to perform well. To achieve self-efficacy you have to constantly do better than others. By definition then, self-esteem and self-efficacy require relative ratings. But self-acceptance means that you view yourself as a “worthy person” whether or not you have great accomplishments. You do not rate you, your personhood, and do not blame yourself for not being better than you are. Of course, you work to improve your acts and traits in order to enjoy yourself and increase your standing in life. But it is unreasonable to disparage yourself simply because you are not the way that you presumably should or must be.

And those quotes are just what I read from Amazon’s book preview. I am now going to have to buy this book and read it. I have found a new appreciation for Dr. Albert Ellis. I think I shall give REBT a more serious look after today.

(Source: driftbending)